Guest Book

There is still a guest book online at the funeral home website.

http://www.flintofts.com/, and type in Lalande, or Bouvier, or Lalande-Bouvier in the search box.

Thank you so much to all that attended the service and to those that have sent words of support.

Life with the Perfect Woman
By Ken Bouvier

Is there such a thing as “The Perfect Woman”?
Perfect, meaning flawless in every way…..no, I don’t think so.
Perfect, meaning exactly who you need to fulfill your life…..absolutely!

From the first time we met, when your big beautiful smile stunned me, to our wedding day when you said “I Do”, Christina, you were the perfect woman for me.

You taught me how to Love, how to Laugh, how to Hug, and how to Cry. You showed me what it means to be self-less, caring, and a true friend. I think I’ve Loved you more than you really knew.

When Jarrett was born, our lives changed forever. We were excited, scared, tired, and stared at him in amazement. We loved him so much from the day we knew of his existence. You knew we were going to be great parents; I wasn’t as sure. You taught me not to be afraid, and to just be myself. You showed me what that meant.

Your ability to walk into a group of my friends, and walk out knowing more about them than I did, will never cease to amaze me. You loved people like nobody I have ever met, and probably ever will. I always knew how perfect you were for me, but I never realized how perfect you were for the world. That has become so evident now that you’re gone.

I know that you’re happy with God in Heaven, but Jarrett and I will be praying that you continue to teach us how to be happy, loving people here on earth.

Thank you for the time that we shared, the things that we did, the lessons, and the love. You know how much we love and miss you.

Your husband, lover, companion, and best friend,
Kenner

Funeral Service

The funeral service and celebration of Christina's life will be as follows:

Saturday, March 7, 2009 at 11:00 AM

Highlands Community Church
3031 NE 10th St.
Renton, WA 98056
425-255-4751
http://www.highlandscc.org/

Children are welcome, and a reception will immediately follow at the church.

In lieu of flowers, we are suggesting that donations be made in Christina's name, to one of the following:

Highlands Community Church, Children's Ministries
3031 NE 10th St.
Renton, WA 98056

Or

Christina Lalande-Bouvier Arts at Apollo Fund
care of: Apollo Elementary PTA
15025 SE 117th st.
Renton, WA 98059
(checks made out to Apollo PTA)

If you prefer, donations to the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society (www.tlls.org/wa) would also be wonderful.

In addition, we are asking that if you would like, please write a letter about Christina (as an example, "When I think of Christina....") and/or provide 5-50 words that you feel describe Christina, and e-mail to: dnslalande@yahoo.com

Also, for those flying in, I’ve now included a list of some hotels in the area, at the bottom of the blog page.

Thank you.
Ken

In Memory of Christina Lalande-Bouvier

After a long battle with several complex issues, Christina's body stopped working and she died peacefully Saturday evening. She was surrounded by family at the time.

As unbelievable, and as hard as this is, Christina is no longer suffering and her spirit is now with God in Heaven. There will never be a replacement for Christina, and all I can do right now is be thankful for the life I shared with her, and for the wonderful son we had together. She will always be in our hearts.

Jarrett's and my lives are going to change dramatically now, but I feel comforted by all of the support that has been given to us thru this time. We're going to need it even more now, and I'm going to need a lot of help raising Jarrett. Christina was so good at that.

If you call and I don't get back to you right away, please understand that it might just be a difficult time to talk, and I will get back to you soon.

As soon as we can get arrangements for the service, I will get the information posted.

Thank you so much.

Ken

Saturday, Feb 28

Since my last update, Christina's progress has degraded. She is currently in the Critical Care Unit due to some complications over the last few days. Her blood pressure dropped dramatically on more than one occasion, and emergency response teams had to come in to get her stabilized again. Her current condition is very serious because of the complexity of the situation with her liver and kidneys, a urinary tract infection, and other, not to mention the lymphoma itself.

Today she will be having an EEG and some other tests, so I will try to provide an update as we learn more.

Please continue the thoughts & prayers.

Ken

Wednesday, Feb 25

Unfortunately, Christina had to spend her birthday in the hospital, and she has been sleeping most of the day. So, we'll have to celebrate another day when she's feeling better, and hopefully at home.

The good news is that her bilirubin levels have continued to trend downward. The number is now below 9, whereas it was about 16 at one point. Normal is around 5 as I understand it. Also, the scan on Monday revealed that the mass has shrunk, and they have now started a more intense radiation therapy on a more focused area, as opposed to the larger area that they had to treat previously. She has had two treatments using the smaller field, and will have seven more to do.

She has been very tired and weak the last couple of days though, and she hasn't been able to eat much because of her mouth sores. For this reason, she has asked not to have visitors, and that might be good for at least the near term. They have adjusted some of her medications, and as soon as she gets some strength back, they will start back on Occupational and Physical Therapy. As soon as she can regain some of her fundamental strength, she should be able to come home. That's our goal right now, as they can continue the dialysis and radiation on an outpatient basis.

Please continue to send your thoughts and prayers for Christina to have the strength to work through this difficult time, and for Jarrett and I, and all of the family to maintain strength as well.

Once again, my sincerest thanks to all, for all you're doing.

Ken

Saturday, Feb 21

It's coming up on 3-1/2 weeks that Christina has been in the hospital, and she will have to be here (I'm currently at the hospital with her after having a movie night and sleepover last night) for at least a few more days. She has dialysis every other day right now, and she finished the first cycle (10 days) of radiation this morning. On Monday they will re-scan her abdomen area to determine the size of the mass. See the previous post for more on that.

Her bilirubin levels have dropped slightly each day for the last few days. That's a good trend. However, some of the other levels that help to indicate liver function have increased or stayed the same, so the doctors still consider her liver condition stable, not necessarily trending better. Some of the levels can be affected by the radiation, so with the positive bilirubin trending, we're considering this to be positive overall. Her general condition, appearance and spunkiness have definitely gotten better from a couple of weeks ago. Keep the thoughts and prayers coming.

This past week Christina really enjoyed having some of her college buddies, her sister and other family around constantly. I think it helped quite a bit. She also had several other visitors, which was good, but she has commented that too many people at once, or even back-to-back vistors makes her tired. Denise is trying to manage this, but it's difficult. Please be patient with us/her, and please don't be offended if she/we ask that you come back another time. She (Christina) can all of a sudden get tired and just need to rest. We know she's feeling better though, because she has no qualms about telling you, me, the nurses, or the doctors, to get lost.

I think that's it for now. Thanks.
Ken

Tuesday, Feb 17

Sorry for the delay in posting an update. I know that everyone is trying to keep up on Christina's status and being patient with me. Thanks for not bombarding me with phone calls. I know it's difficult not knowing what's going on, but to some extent that's kind of how it's going right now.

As of this morning her status is basically the same. Her liver and kidneys are the primary areas of concern right now. In my previous post I mentioned that her bilirubin levels had gone up. That changes a bit each day, along with her liver enzyme levels. What we've come to find out is that it's not necessarily the individual increases or decreases that are critical, but rather the trend that is developing. At this point, the trend is simply stable. There have been small increases and small decreases, but no real upward or downward trend. However, her condition is still serious because the levels are very high overall. We want the levels to start trending downward.

She is continuing to have dialysis to help her kidney function, and radiation to shrink the mass. Right now the radiation is key to her progress. The reason for her kidney and liver function issues are due to the mass pushing on them, and preventing them from working properly (some recent tests confirmed that the stints in her ureters are still clear and able to function as needed).

She has had 6 of her initial 10 radiation treatments, so this initial cycle should be completed this week. On Monday, 2/23 they will do a scan of the mass to determine it's size now, and hopefully be able to narrow the radiation field and increase intensity in a more focused treatment. Right now it's more of a wide range field because of the size of the mass.

Christina has had several visitors recently, and I think it has helped to boost her spirits, which is also key to her progress. She's got to remain strong and positive throughout this difficult time. She's also got to be able to rest. Denise (Christina's sister) is in the process of putting together a visitation schedule, to try to prevent times where too many people are visiting, but to provide plenty of coverage of visitors.

Please keep up the prayers and positive thoughts. We need them. And thanks for all of the kindness.

Ken

Friday morning status - Feb 13

As of last night, Christina's condition has declined somewhat. They're continuing dialysis, and have started back on the radiation treatments. But her bilirubin levels have increased and she is very jaundice. At this point the doctors are not sure why.


We have a Nurse Navigator that is arranging a family meeting sometime today, where we will sit down with all of the specialists (Kidney Dr, Liver Dr, Oncologist, maybe others), to review all of her symptoms, get questions answered, and talk about what we have to do next.


Some of Christina's friends from out of town called to say they are flying in today, so she will have a few visitors for the next few days. I think that it might be best to have others hold off for now. It is hard to judge when she wants visitors, and when she doesn't, but for now I think that would be best.

I will try to provide an update as soon as I can after the family meeting.

Thanks,
Ken

Quick Update-Tuesday, Feb 10

Not much new on Christina at this point, other than she has moved from Critical Care to Progressive Care, which is good. She is still having dialysis and they have not scheduled chemo or further radiation treatments yet. They've got to confirm that the dialysis is working as expected, and that she's stabilized. Her legs are also still very swollen, and she still has some trouble talking, due to some mouth sores and dry mouth. That has definitely gotten better though.

The last two days she was in good spirits. Sunday she had a several visitors, and Sunday night, Christina, Jarrett and I were having a lot of laughs. Christina was cracking Jarrett up. It was great to see. Yesterday she was also doing well, but I couldn't get down there until the evening, and I think she was actually a bit lonely. So, I think she's up for visitors more now, especially during the day, because I've had to work.

I have to go out of town Wed afternoon until Thurs evening, so if a few people could visit during those times, that would be great. Jarrett will be staying with Connor, and Christina's mom Mary will be around, so I think all of the logistics are taken care of. It's just the visits that we'll need help with these days, now that she seems more up for visitors. Please be aware that she does still get tired, so you have to guage how she's doing, as to how long it's best to stay.

Speaking of logistics, bringing meals has gotten so popular that I've had to outsource the scheduling of that. There's a sort of consortium that has formed to take this on, but it will be headed by Tina White, bless her soul. The Meal Schedule link on this page will still be used, but you'll see that Tina has some coordination instructions now. Tina's contact info is (also on Meal page):

Tina White
tinawhite86@gmail.com
425-793-6433

Thanks,
Ken

Saturday, Feb 7

Well, after a week and a half, Christina is still in the hospital and we're not sure when she'll be able to go home at this point. They were able to get the stints in, without any problems; everything went well. The stints helped, from the standpoint that the kidneys are now able to move fluids to the bladder, but the kidneys are still not functioning as they should be. So, she will be having dialysis for at least the near term. She is having two hours today and three hours tomorrow. Until they see how she is responding to the dialysis, the doctors don't know how long it will need to continue. They are still hopeful that it will be temporary in nature, and that her kidneys will recover and return to functioning normally.

She continues to have good and bad days. Yesterday she was doing very well. She said she slept "awesome" the night before - the best she's slept in quite some time. So, she had a lot of energy (relatively speaking). Last night was different; she said she slept "like crap", so she's not as lively today, but doing OK. She has had some visitors, and I wish I could say that it's ok for everyone to come visit, but I'm not sure that would be wise. She's in the Critical Care unit, and when she's having dialysis they don't want her heart rate going up and down. So until things are a bit more stabilized, I'm going to ask that everyone, other than family, refrain for now. Hopefully she will begin feeling consistently better soon. I will provide an update as soon as that happens.

The next cycle of chemotherapy hasn't been scheduled yet, until they see how she responds to the dialysis. It's a balancing act at this point because she can't have the chemo until her body is able, but the sooner they can continue the chemo, the faster her body will be able. They were able to give her the Rituxan last week, along with a day of radiation, but the focus shifted to getting her kidney functions working properly before proceeding. Again, hopefully over the next couple of days she'll be doing much better, and we'll be able to move forward.

Jarrett and I are doing pretty good. He's been having some sleepovers, and has some more planned. We were able to make it to Dining with Dads last night, and he and I are going to see Pink Panther 2 this afternoon.

Keep the positive thoughts and prayers coming, and she enjoys the cards, magazines, and books when she has the energy to read them. Unfortunately in Critical Care they won't allow flowers, so those will have to wait.

That's it for now. Thanks again.

Wednesday, Feb 4 Status

Christina is still in the hospital, and has been since last Wednesday/Thursday (see previous post). She's been receiving fluids via IV, in an effort to re-hydrate her, but yesterday they discontinued that because she was doing better, hydration-wise.


She was scheduled to start chemotherapy treatments this past Monday, but, because of her symptoms, those treatments didn't start. The mass is still pushing on her kidneys, ureters, vena cava, and other organs in her abdominal area, causing some of the symptoms that she's having. Since the ureters are being pushed on, it's causing some blockage which is preventing her kidneys from functioning like they should, which is to clean the blood and filter waste from it. With the kidneys not functioning fully, the chemotherapy drugs will not be cleared from her body, which would cause an excessive toxicity in her system.

So, they are going to do two things at this point; 1) install stints in the ureters, to allow the proper flow of urine to her bladder, and 2) radiation therapy to shrink the mass faster. The radiation will probably be started today, and the stints are scheduled for tomorrow afternoon (about a 20 minute, minimally invasive procedure thru the bladder). This will hopefully help all of the symptoms that she's having; shortness of breath, tightness in her stomach, and swollen legs, due to restricted blood flow back to her heart thru the vena cava (see below).

If all goes as planned, I think she will start her next cycle of chemotherapy next week. However, the Rituxan will probably be given today, because of the nature of the drug, and it's ability to just attack the CD20 B-cell Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma.

Please continue with your positive thoughts, and prayers for Christina and our family. We do appreciate it. Also, thanks so much for all of the kind offers, actions, and patience. I'm trying to utilize our support system, as needs arise.

Ken

Quick Update

Just a quick update for today. Obviously, I changed the blog format again, as you can see. But, you'll also notice a link on the right side for 'Food Schedule'. This is an attempt to coordinate everyone who would like to bring food, because of all the requests.

Christina is currently in the hospital, because on Wednesday she starting having swelling in her legs again, some abdominal tightness, and was short of breath. We spent the night in the ER, they admitted her to the hospital around 3 AM Thursday (I got home about 4 AM), and she spent last night there as well. They were doing some additional tests last night and this morning, but at this point, it appears it was de-hydration. She does have a couple of clots in her legs. They are/will be giving her some blood thinners and other, to address those. Wednesday night they checked for clots in her lungs, and they were fine. She was in very good spirits last night. She was even cracking jokes for the first time in quite a while. That's it for now. I've got to run, but I will try to update as soon as I know more.

Blog & Christina Update

As you may have noticed, I modified the blog again, just a bit. I had given everyone access to make posts, but it started causing some problems because of the sheer number of people. I received some e-mails that the blog was full, or something like that. So, I've changed it back, that only I have posting rights. The other posts that were there have been moved to comments. I guess you can do that when it's your blog....

Everyone can still make comments, so please continue to do so. For those who aren't "registered" with the blog service, you can comment as 'Name/URL', and just enter your name, or as 'Anonymous', and just put your name within the text of the comment, if you want to. To comment, just click the link that says "X Comments" right below this post. Let me know if you have problems.

I added the calendar at the bottom, and I entered the schedule of treatments along with some Dr. appointments, as we currently have scheduled. As of right now, the last round is scheduled for the middle of March. Obviously, that will depend on how Christina is responding to the treatments.

We've had so many people offer to bring food, I'm thinking that maybe we can use the calendar as a way to schedule that as well. I'll be working with a couple of people to figure that out.

Since everyone's been asking how I'm holding up, the answer is: pretty good. It's amazing how much something like this can turn your world upside down, but at the same time, make you realize how many people are there for you when you need them. Jarrett's had play dates, sleepover's, and even a movie date with an older woman. He said it was "awesome", but now he wants to open his own "Hotel for Dogs."

I would say that my biggest struggle is going to be balancing work with being available for Christina. Fortunately, my boss has been extremely flexible with all of this. This week I did not want to leave Christina home by herself, so I was able to work from home, and flex my schedule a bit (I've virtually been out of the office since before Christmas). Going forward, I'm not sure how she's going to feel, and whether Mary (Christina's mom) will be able to stay with her the whole time (Mary is just getting over the flu, herself), but I'm going to have to get back to the office next week for sure. This may be an area that I'll be needing help with, I'm just not sure yet. By the way, several people have offered to come over, or fly out from all over the country to stay with her (us). It is truly appreciated, but I'm not sure if it's needed yet, or how to schedule people, if needed. I do know that not all of you will fit in the guest room at once. :-) There is one group already scheduled (Denise, Clinton, Zuri and Nia), because their visit was planned long ago, and Christina can't wait to see Zuri and Nia (you too, Denise and Clinton, it's just not the same; sorry). Aside from that, we'll have to see how it goes.

Now, on to how Christina is doing currently. I'll say she's doing "pretty good" also. She did make it to Church last Sunday, but she was very tired by the time it ended. She also walked with me to pick up Jarrett at the bus yesterday. So, she's getting out and about a bit, but she still gets tired pretty easily. So far, she has had very little nausea, so we're praying that continues. Eating is still difficult, and she gets full pretty quickly, so we're praying that gets better. The swelling in her calves and feet is gone, so that's a great thing, but she's lost a lot of weight, so we'll just keep working on getting more food/calories in her.

We had a doctor appt on Wednesday, and they checked her blood counts. Her counts are low, but she's not in need of another transfusion at this point, so that's good. Since her white blood cell counts are low, we've got to be careful not to expose her to anyone who is sick. This has been a challenge because I've had a cough/cold, but I think it's drawing to a close. So, if you're wanting to come by, please refrain if you're not feeling well. We've got another doctor appt on Monday, to re-check her blood counts, so we'll see where we go from there.

I think that covers it for now. Again, thanks to you all for everything you're doing. Keep the thoughts, hopes, prayers coming. We appreciate it.

Ken

Sunday, January 18

Well, the first round is complete. I think Christina has more energy now, than at the beginning of the week. She has been up and about quite a bit more, and has actually been out for a social visit with Dinah, two doors down. If you attend Highlands Community Church, you may even see her today at the 9:30 service.

Various people have said that sometimes it takes a few days for the fatigue to set in, so we'll see how this week goes. With the extreme fatigue that she had at the start of this all, I'm hopeful that it will all get better from here on out. The swelling in her lower legs has improved dramatically. This was believed to be caused by the mass surrounding her aorta and restricting blood flow from her legs back to her heart, so maybe this is a sign that the treatments are already making progress. That's what I'm choosing to believe at this point.

As mentioned, up top this point Christina hasn't had any difficult side affects from the treatments, so we'll just hope and pray that this continues. Her white blood cell shot last night was a bit painful (of course), but so far not much bone pain, which is one of the possible side affects.

Thanks again, so much, to everyone for your thoughts, prayers, food, flowers, and support. This has made a HUGE difference. I have always believed that Christina is a very un-selfish person, and it's even more evident to me now, by the amount of un-selfish deeds and love being offered back to her and our family, in this difficult time. Thanks!

Well, last weekend we took a journey to Jarrett's cousin Heather's house, for a haircutting extravaganza. Christina, to prepare for her potential hair loss, and Jarrett & I, to show support. If you know Jarrett, you know he loves his long hair, so that was a big step for him. He thinks it looks cool now, thanks to Heather's skills. As for me, not a huge sacrifice, but you'd be amazed at how much warmth you get from even a little bit of hair. Anyway, I'm going to attempt to attach the before and after pics.

As you probably noticed, I made some changes to the blog format. I'm experimenting when I have some time. Let me know if it's working, or if you have comments.

Talk to you soon.

Ken

Wednesday, Jan 14, 2009

Here's the first update since the e-mail I sent.

Monday Christina had her porta-cath installed. Went well, but a long day. We were at the surgery center at 8:00 for a 10:00 surgery, but her platelets were a bit too low, so they had to start another platelet infusion before they could start installing the porta-cath. I think we finally got home about 2:30. Lesson for the day - make sure I donate blood this year. You never know who might need it, and when.

Yesterday she had her first treatment; a drug called Rituxan. This day was even longer. We had to be there at 7:30 AM, because this drug takes at least 5 hours to administer, if no reactions. Virtually everybody has a reaction of some sort, and Christina was no exception. After a short intermission from the Rituxan (about an hour or so) along with some additional antihistamines, etc. Christina did just fine and we were home a little after 8:00 PM. Lesson for this day - hang on to your friends and family. They are very helpful when it comes to things like cleaning, cooking, watching Jarrett, providing support, bringing you food, letting Jarrett sleep over and taking him to school so you can make a 7:30 appt, and picking him up at the bus, entertaining him, and receiving dinner made by another friend because you couldn't get home until after 8:00.

Today........Well, unfortunately it's scheduled to be another long day. PET scan at 8:30 (2-3 hours), then the first chemotherapy agents start today, at 1:30. Initially, doctor Hersman was thinking of administering Cytoxan and Fludarabine for the chemotherapy, but after discussing Christina's case further, with Dr. Pagel from the Seattle Cancer Care Alliance, they've all agreed that one day of Novantrone with Fludarabine (today), followed by 2 more days of Fludarabine would be best. The chemotherapy is only supposed to take a couple of hours, so our days of treatment should start to get shorter. We'll see. We'll do whatever it takes.

FYI - the schedule for the rest of the week is as follows:
Thursday - chemotherapy @ 2:30
Friday - chemotherapy @ 2:00
Saturday - white blood cell booster injection @ 4:00

It will be at least a few weeks before the next cycle, so hopefully she'll start to feel much better between cycles.

Thanks again for everyone's support in this.

Ken

Original E-mail

*******Original e-mail*********

In order to notify as many people as possible, as quickly as possible, I thought I would send out an e-mail, in lieu of trying to call everyone.

For some of you, this will be the first time you're hearing of this. I apologize. Christina has been feeling ill for almost 3 months now, with a wide variety of symptoms (body aches, stomach pain, gum infection and others), and she would feel good sometimes and bad sometimes. Finally, after a CT scan and blood tests on 12/30, they found that she had a "mass" in her abdominal cavity (area behind her abdomen) and low platelet and red blood cell levels. She had a biopsy of the mass last Friday and bone marrow biopsy on Monday. We got the results from these yesterday, and had a consultation with the Oncologist last night. I don't have all of my notes with me, so some of this will not be exact. She has been diagnosed with Follicular Lymphoma, which is a low-grade Lymphoma.


At this point, her treatments will be a combination of a medication called Rituxan and chemotherapy. This treatment will probably begin either later this week or first thing next week. The treatments will be something like: 1st day - Rituxan, 2nd, 3rd and 4th day - chemotherapy. This will then be repeated in 3-4 weeks and she will probably require 3-4 treatment cycles. The doctors have all said that Lymphoma is "very treatable".


For those interested, her doctors are: John A. Hersman and Jonathan C. Britell of Southlake Clinic, who will be reviewing her treatments with John M. Pagel, an assistant professor of Medicine, in the UW Division of Oncology and an assistant member at the Fred Hutchinson Cancer Research Center. That's about it for now. Thank you so much for all of your phone calls and thoughts and prayers. Please be patient with us (me). I'm trying to keep people informed as we learn more. As you all know, Christina has A LOT of good friends, and caring family, so I'm doing the best I can.


Thanks, Ken